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My careless father forcing to marry a man of his choice

My father forcing to marry with a person of his choice. First I will tell you about my family, a heart patient father and cancer patient mother, we have 3 daughters. Their first daughter always wants to achieve something but due to our family situation we married her to a rich family so that she can study better and achieve something but they are evil in some matters and my sister is also behaving badly like getting jealous of many things. They used domestic violence on her, so we took her with her both children to our home. While marrying she is 18 only. After she came to our house she changed. 

As a normal girl she expected many things like love, life and didn’t consider her children. We stopped her everytime when she was having an affair. At this time my second sister eloped with my relative with help of my first sister. My parents were heartbroken. I was studying pg and I am also having an affair with wrong person without knowing his true identity. My first sister got separated from us and shifted to new home with her children. Our second sister also moved to a new home and my parents forgave them because he is a relative. 

So far as my matter they find out and put me house arrest for 2 years. At that time only I knew about my evil partner. I left home and broke up with him. I have joined in one institution as asst. prof. because of my affair my parents get me engaged to one of their relative. He is soft, gentle, silent but not act as a man. Besides this my father forcing to marry with him. We got engaged for more than 5 years but he only text me for sexual matters which I don’t like, told to my parents that I don’t like him. But they don’t consider for it. They want to earn respect in mid of their relatives through my marriage. I am still bound to my home because I spoiled the trust of my parents. But I have waited for more than 5 years and I am in the same stage. 

One more thing my first sister loved one of my relatives but my parents are against it and then only married that rich. My second sister also tried for parents approval for her love relationship but they didn’t consider. I am going to tell one more thing which is so shame to me. We are sexually abused by our father and some relatives but we cant tell outside at that time. Now I am in love with one boy who is 8 yrs younger than me. He is good. Now my first sister is arranging a grant marriage for herself which is so embarrassing for my family. 

Therefore, I am approving of her marriage but not his grand type because her daughter is 17 yrs old plus I don’t like it. Now I don’t know what to choose whether my family or my life. But my parents only think of our highest community and pride. I always don’t think or behave according to the community. In my vision all are the same. Now tell me what should I do? I want my life. I want to get married soon. Now my age is 30 & I want to go somewhere where no one knows about me and want to live peacefully.

Question from: Tamil Nadu

Your parents are careless people and did shameful acts in your life. In this situation you should ignore their false pride and take a decision from your conscience. Your fiance only wants from you the satisfaction of his sexual desire. This is not a sign of a good life partner. You have the exclusive right to choose your life partner. Your parents’ consent is not necessary for marriage. Therefore your father cannot force to marry with him. Section 5 of the Hindu Marriage Act enunciates that an adult and sound person can solemnise marriage as per his free consent. 

You should cancel the proposal of marriage with that guy because he is not compatible with you. The compatibility issue will ruin your married life so you should take a bold decision and end this relationship. You can cancel the engagement and it will not create any legal liability except for the return of gifts exchanged between you. He can claim compensation to the extent of expenses incurred in the engagement ceremony. You should resist your father for forcing to marry with such a bad guy.

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